A question for unionists

I have a question for anyone who considers themselves to be a Unionist. It's something I've always wondered about, so I'm putting it out there now.

What aspects that you, as Ulster Unionists, envisage about the prospect of a United Ireland make you opposed to it?

It seems to me that given the lack of any actual presentation of a vision for unifying Ireland by either Sinn Fein, the SDLP or the Southern parties, that there is no actual vision on the table. Rather, the idea of a United Ireland is a vacuum, an absence, a tabula rasa.

So since a unified island nation could potentially be anything you wish it to be, what is it that you, as Unionists are concerned about?

Rules of Engagement: Entitlement to British citizenship is already secured under the GFA, and the Republic isn't a Catholic theocracy.
Therefore arguments based on an attachment to a British (or to be accurate a Northern Irish or British-Irish) identity or opposition to the Catholic Church aren't valid for the purposes of this discussion.
Trolls posing as Unionists and those suspected of being such don't get to play, and non-Unionists don't get to second-guess or mindread what they think Unionist opinions on the issue really are.

What I'm really curious about here is what do Unionists believe a United Ireland might look like, what do they fear or oppose in that, is there a form of United Ireland acceptable to Unionists, and if not, why not?

I await your answers with eager interest. The floor is yours.

So what's this Lisbon Treaty thing about?

This just in from the Department of the Bleeding Obvious: Most Irish people haven't a clue what this Lisbon treaty malarkey is about.

Why is that, do you think? Might it have something to do with the fact that the document is so difficult and complex to summarise that everyone just gave up trying to explain it?

That seemed to be EU Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso's position this week when he visited Cork and deigned to take a few questions from a hand-picked selection of langers.

But it's not that complex: here's a nice, simple (pro-EU) summary of what the treaty will do, from Auntie Beeb.

Then again, it might be because the Lisbon Treaty is just the failed EU Constitution rehashed. That constitution failed because the good people of France and Holland rejected it in referenda.

So this time around, the EU mandarins have made two clever changes: firstly, they're not calling it a constitution, and secondly they're not allowing any referenda.

So basically, whatever the people of Europe might think or want, their governments are not permitting them to decide for themselves. Unfortunately for the EU mandarins, that doesn't fly in Ireland. Our national constitution DEMANDS that a referendum has to be held.

So what will Lisbon bring if we vote for it? Well, some of the scary NO people would have you think it will bring in abortion on demand, bio-chips in your babies, an EU army with a draft during wartimes, and all sorts of other nasties.

That's not strictly true. But what IS in the treaty is scary enough without people having to make shit up.

• There'll be an EU parliament that can overrule the Dail.
• There'll be an EU army, albeit without a compulsory draft (for now.)
• There'll be an EU government in the shape of a beefed-up EU Commission.
• There'll be an EU Foreign Minister implementing foreign policy on a Europe-wide basis, overruling national foreign policies.
• There'll be a Europe-wide justice system, in the shape of a beefed-up European Courts of Justice.

In short, if Lisbon succeeds, you will cease to be a citizen of Ireland in any meaningful legal sense, compared to how you will be a citizen of Europe.

Lisbon is a charter for a federal Europe. But to admit that would be to see it defeated, so the mandarins have been terrifically careful to avoid the F-word.

Of course Fianna Fail, Fine Gael and Labour all like Lisbon. It's a charter that creates new levels of politics and power and bureaucracy.

But it's not something that's good for the people of Ireland or the people of Europe.

Why else do you think that diplomats and civil servants were seeking to delay bad news from Europe until after the referendum?

Why do they believe you will vote whatever way Irish politicians tell you to, and why do they think the treaty is 'largely incomprehensible' to the lay person?

The answer lies here, in the embarrassing email the British Embassy in Dublin sent to London after a secret meeting with Irish civil servants about the Lisbon Treaty.

Basically, it's a con that they're inflicting on us, because they think we're stupid and easily led and because they think we won't read the damn thing. I hope we prove them wrong on all of their arrogant counts.

Unfortunately, it's up to us and us alone to pull the EU back from the brink of a Federal Europe and all that entails.

So vote sensibly. Vote against the Lisbon Treaty if you believe in national sovereignty, if you believe in democracy in Europe and if you believe in Ireland.

Vote NO to Lisbon.

Safe home, and don't forget these other 5,000 troops

As 38 years of Operation Banner comes to an end, perhaps we can finally put the spectre of the troubles behind us and move forward.

Then again, it would be a lot easier to do that if it weren't for the 5,000 British troops remaining in the North of Ireland even though the UK government has 'no strategic interest' in the place.

I'm no cornerboy republican, but this looks like more games with language from the British government to me. If 5,000 troops remain on Irish soil, then it's still under occupation. If 5,000 troops remain, then the operation is still ongoing. No PR spin can change those realities.

I look forward to the day when ALL the paramilitary organisations lay down their arms (are you listening, UDA?) and when ALL the British troops have withdrawn from the North of Ireland.

At that point, it might finally become possible for people to speak to each other, listen to each other, and create a democratic society moving forward without the baleful influence of the British military, their Loyalist proxies, or their Republican enemies.

Until then, it's a case of 'Slan Abhaile' to those troops leaving, and 'Can you take your 5,000 mates with you, please?'

Below is one of many murals depicting the theme of this very day. This one, by renowned artist Robert Ballagh, was done in Derry in the mid-Nineties. But similar images have graced walls in the Short Strand, Falls and Ardoyne areas of Belfast.

Will he make a thousand days?

Sorry for the delays in updates. I've been busy.

So, obviously, is Tony Blair.

It's over 940 days now since our Tone promised to resign. That's nearly three years of lies, war and deceit from 'New Labour.'

Rumour has it he's going to go before the likely-to-be-disastrous Scottish election results.

And about time too.

Try not to cry on your way out the door, there's a good chap.

Visionary

Kudos to El Blogador for his photoshopping skills which provided a much needed giggle today.

My personal favourites among his collection of humorous doctored images are the Sinn Fein/British Government marriage cert and the report card for British rule in Northern Ireland.

How to avoid the Brits

... or, to put it another way, which holiday destinations have the lowest density of English soccer hooligans?

As Christmas hastens hard upon, it is at times like these that a man's thoughts, honed by the howling wind outside his door, turn to the holidays. The SUMMER holidays, that is. The time you get to soak up beers and sunrays as opposed to the time imminent when you soak up abuse from distant relatives.

According to some research by the BBC, there are a number of countries out there best ignored if you want to avoid Brits, and apparently only one of them is Britain. (Three if you're being picky.)

Scarily, one in ten Brits now live abroad, a figure approaching the European record set by Ireland where something like thirty out of every ten passport holders live abroad, due to the fact that it has become the designer second citizenship of choice for many Yanks and Brits.

Yup. If they're not taking out Irish passports, those pesky Brits are emigrating en masse to your and my favourite holiday destinations, intent on making a shite of them. Which raises some questions about the popularity of Tony Blair's regime back home, when you think about it.

Australia, Spain, America, Canada and Ireland might as well be British already (should that be again?) there are so many Brits living there. And poor old New Zealand, South Africa and France are next to be Britified. (Again, one thinks, not for the first time either.)

Most of South America and large chunks of the Gulf and East Africa are also showing disturbing signs of turning Brit, according to the Beeb, and even countries like Thailand, Libya and China are not safe from their baleful influence.

So where does this leave the poor Irish holidaymaker, desperate to avoid the tens of millions of Brits masquerading as Irish people?

I'd suggest Berlin, Budapest and the Cape Verde Islands for your summer break this year, people. Such is the rate of property purchase by Irish investors, that the likelihood is that by summer there won't be any indigenous people left in any of those places, and you'll have it all to yourself.

Well, you and the half a million Paddies who bought up the neighbourhood, that is.

So in short, Santa, I'd like downtown commercial property in the historical centre of Tallinn for Christmas because I've been very good.

And baby Jesus, can we swap the six million British people pretending to be Irish for the 1.5 million Irish people pretending to be British, and then we could have world peace, just like Miss World promised?

Screw it, we'll even take the septics too. In the name of world peace, like.