A spanner is a handy technical implement used for tightening up loose connections and to keep moving parts in good working order.
Steve Staunton is therefore not a spanner.
A muppet is one of an ensemble of entertainers who brought delight and joy to people the world over with their wonderful performances over a number of decades.
Steve Staunton is clearly not a muppet.
The gaffer is the person responsible for overseeing the lighting arrangements on the set of a movie, ensuring that illumination is shed both behind the scenes and on the performance that is broadcast to an audience of millions. The gaffer is often responsible for providing a steady source of power during the performance.
By no stretch of the imagination is Steve Staunton the gaffer.
Steve Staunton has presided over a national embarrassment, squandering national assets and demonstrating a hitherto unknown level of incompetence.
He has shown an utter lack of leadership, has failed to come up with even the simplest forward planning and relies on preposterous excuses to remain in his job, despite huge public unhappiness with his complete lack of achievement.
Obviously, Steve Staunton is actually a cabinet minister.
